John Edwards drops out

John Edwards, the "populist" ex- NC senator, has dropped out of the race for the Democratic Presidential nomination, failing to realize his life's purpose of ending poverty in America.

Edwards based his campaign on a strong anti-corporate message aimed at labor unions and the middle class; unfortunately many large unions didn't want to risk losing their hard earned patronage jobs by going against Hillary and the Democratic establishment. He got the backing of some smaller unions, but most of the major national unions ended up endorsing Clinton.

Edwards was trying to position himself to the left of Clinton and Obama, but I don't think enough people bought what he was selling. He voted for the Iraq war and the Patriot Act, but highlighted his opposition to both during his campaign. Another main theme of his campaign was his "Two Americas" rhetoric, which might have fallen flat after stories of his $400 haircut and personal fortune were pushed by the media.

If I had to hazard a guess, I would assume that Edwards has cut some kind of deal with either Clinton or Obama, perhaps Attorney General in an Obama administration? Whatever happens we know that John Edwards will work tirelessly to end poverty in America, pausing only for an occasional trim of his flowing chestnut locks, or perhaps to nap at his 30,000 square foot mansion. Don't worry Poor America, "Hope, is on the way!"